If You Love Money, It’ll Love You Back

Relationship with money and debt

“Money is the root of all evil”

Biggest Money Myth.

Newsflash – It isn’t money that’s evil, its the the things people do to get it and the way they handle it. Think of all the people you’ve heard say this. What’s their relationship with money? I bet it’s a complicated one!

There’s a reason for that:

Love and respect money and it will love and respect you!

Think of the people you love. You respect them and show them how much you appreciate them right? In your time of need, they run to your rescue because you have a relationship build on love, trust and respect.

It’s the same with money.

If you respect it, protect it and treat it like a loved one, it will be there for you in your time of need. The same goes for fear. If you fear money, it will run as fast as it can in the other direction too.

You know who uses terms like “money is the root of all evil”, those who fear money.

I’ve feared money myself in the past, and as much as I hate to admit it, I haven’t always respected it either. I thought I loved it, but I loved it the wrong way. I was abusive and threw it away without a moments thought. I was careless and insensitive and as a result, I went through a period in my life when money just didn’t love me. Even when I begged and pleaded for it to take me back, it just wasn’t having it.

So I hated it even more. I told myself that all my stress came from the evil dollar. That I felt unaccomplished and angry because I just couldn’t make my money stretch far enough. The money was causing me to be unhappy… and guess what?

I woke up one day and found myself in a 5-figure debt.

Of course it didn’t happen overnight. All that unnecessary shopping, eating out at fancy restaurants and paying for a gym membership and trainer I NEVER used adds up. And that’s when the real stress began.

Except I realized that I had to fess up to my own mistakes, because the only thing that was evil was my spending habits. So I developed a new relationship with money and here’s what I did:

1) Got to know it

How many of us are so overwhelmed with the thought of debt that we can’t even bear to open our statements? I got to know and understand my financial situation. I grabbed a glass of wine and opened all of my statements. I shed some angry tears along the way, but I needed to. I needed to understand the sheer magnitude of where my finances were.

I then did the one thing that changed my relationship with money. For the first time in my life, I created a budget. I kid you not, my life and relationship with money changed. When you create a budget, you make yourself  accountable for the financial decisions you make.  When you feel more accountable you slowly stop making dumb decisions.

2) Planned for a future together

Sticking to a budget was hard. For the first time in my adult life, I actually had to tell myself (and others)  ‘no’. Once I got into the groove of my budget, I started to create a long-term relationship with my money.

I didn’t just plan until my next pay check came in, but the next few months and years. I started to think about things like retirement, emergency savings and investments to make sure that I don’t find myself in a situation where I cry over money again.

3) Learned to love and adore it

After a short period of time, I learned to stop hating and fearing money. Instead, I developed a new type of relationship with it. One where I respected it, understood that it was just there to be good to me and I gave it love.

I learned loved it and attempted to bring more of it into my life. I learned to challenge my strengths, talents and career to ensure that I was reaching my peak potential to make more money. I became an entrepreneur and created an even stronger bond with money.

I look back to the days when I believed that money was the root of all evil and after my long, but necessary, journey I realize that it’s not the root of all evil, the relationship I had with money was.

What kind of  relationship do you have with money?

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